Sudboy
May. 19th, 2006
04:28 pm
So after long talks with Jonathan, we both decided it was best that we are no longer boyfriends. So it's official, Stef is single again. I am super sad about it and wish things would of gone differently, but unfortunetly the things preventing us from going on to the next level are not things that need to be changed but simply clash of vision and personality. No fighting was done and everything is super cool between both of us. It was a very smooth break up for both of us. We are going to be friends and hanging out won't be an issue. Well from my end at least. So single with the summer off, that sounds kind of nice....but i will miss his warm arms around me for sure. It was a good run and I have 0 regrets. He is a great guy and he will make somoeone very happy one day I am sure. On to the next chapter.....anxious to see what's going to happen......
S.
May. 8th, 2006
12:15 pm
Weekend was pretty chill, minus a little bit of drama here and there all seems to be good and settling back in it's place. Friday night was pretty fun, after work Mister John met me for our walk home, new routine i am really enjoying. Walking home with someone is much more fun then alone, and it's motivating me to walk as opposed to bussing a whole 4 stops. Being lazy is great :). Headed back to my place to smoke a J and hang out. It was fun, soon after Derek joined us and we started drinking some Vodka. I was not feeling it though, so had like one drink and all it gave me was kind of a headache. Basially hung around and played some Dance Dance Revolution and with the Eye Toy. Everyone seemed to enjoy the eyetoy. Made me happy cause since i've gotten it I have never really played it....so made it feel like it was not a total waste of money! Saturday was spent mostly hanging around the house, me and my roomy did a lot of cleaning around the house, still not done....but vast improvement. It's crazy on how long it takes to setup your house. It's like it never ends......one day it will be setup...another few days like last Saturday and we should be good to boot! Started to paint my kitchen also, I am painting my cubbords white cause there is just too much yellow in there for me. It's a little on the bright side.....so one coat done and after one more i should be good to go. After painting that, headed to Jonathan's to paint his kitchen, what was supposed to take only a few hours ended up consuming the entire night and we are still not done. But it's all good...saved me some money i just don't have anyways! We are probly going to finishing that tonight at some point. Sunday was spend doing basiclly nothing also....so yeah...very relaxing. I hope this week has beautiful sunny days everyday. Today is just amazing out....I don't want to be at work right now........so yeah....that's nothing new!
S.
May. 4th, 2006
10:55 am
Favorite TV quote of the year....
"When I sit next to you.....All i smell is bitch" Joni - America's Next Top Model
S.
09:37 am
Last night was so much fun! Finished work and got a bunch of phone calls and shortly after a bunch of us hit up The Fox & The Feather for pitcher fest 2006. We drank so much......needless to say I am feeling really rough today! I really hate being at work when hung over. My bed is a much better place to be today. But in the end it was totally worth it! I had so much fun last night, it's so nice to have Derek back in town, but at the same time I know there will be much more partying now that he is here! Got to hang out with Alison for the second time this week and that is always a treat. She is one fun girl.....specially when drunk! I am so tired now......
S.
May. 2nd, 2006
01:19 pm - How Romantic
I had the most romantic thing happen to me yesterday. So very nice...sorry in advance if this makes you barf a little........but it made me smile....
So yesterday I receive a phone call from Jonathan saying to not make plans after work and would not tell me more. So I agreed and patiently waited for my end of shift to come. So once I was done, I called him before leaving my floor and he told me to go down to Treats and there should be something there for me. I thought it was a little odd, but I went with it. Got to treats and asked for my package. The lady at the counter gave me a rose with a little card attached to it, an actual card and two pieces of the Rocky Road Cake I love so very much. So I read the first card and it said some really nice words that I will keep to myself. I was super happy at this point and was surprised because it was out of the blue with no expectation of this. After reading the first card, I open the one attached to the rose and it simply said go to ROC ROC Papers and Gifts. It's a store on Elgin st I pass on my way home from work. So I arrive at the store and the two ladies behind the counter were both smiling up at me. I am sure I blushed a little. So I ask them if they have something for me and they said yes and handed me another rose with a little card on it, a helium balloon and a little gift. I was so happy at this point and did not know what to make of all this. So I read the second little card and it simply said, "Go To Pure Gelato". Off I went to continue my what seems to be a scavenger hunt. I arrive at Pure Gelato and the three young girls across the counter seemed eager to serve me. First thing I notice behind the counter, another rose with a big red balloon floating. So the girls give me my rose and balloon and three huge scoops of Gelato. I did not get to pick the flavors because they were already picked for me. First flavor was Passion Fruit, the second was Strawberry Passion and the third I forgot but all had a loving theme to the flavors. So I grabbed my Gelato and savored the sweet taste. That place is so very yummy. I then read my third card; it read "Go to our Swings". So I head out with my three roses and three balloons and cross the street to the Park me and Jonathan like to go to. Attached to the swing we used last week was fourth balloon with another rose with a card and a cute teddy bear. All the ladies at the park with there kids were asking me so many questions and seemed to be so happy for me. I did not know how to react to this as it is so foreign to me. So I read the fourth card and it said I will see you at home. I start walking home and I see two balloons full of x's and o's tied outside my house. I continued up the stairs to my apartment and find my room full of balloons and streamers all over the place and finally a fifth rose on my bead with the message I love you.......I was speechless, it was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me. I had no words to say to him, I was just overly happy and red in the cheeks. It was the sweetest thing that's ever happened to me...........
S.
May. 1st, 2006
02:23 pm
It's been ages since my last update. Things are good, Elgin life is treating me really well. It's fun cause I have many friends that live blocks away from me and it makes to always have some type of plans when i am done work. My house has become kind of like a social hub for my friends and it's really cool. Seeing I was coming from a house where it was hard and akward to have constant guest due to being respectful to my many many roomates. Now that has changed and I love it!
Things with Jonathan are going really well. I have no complaints at all. It's strange cause during the first part of our relationship, things were akward, sometimes shaky, but since the move to Elgin st.....there has been nothing but bliss between the both of us. We have really learnt a lot about ourselves and our limits and boundries. I know what he likes, he knows what I like and we don't pressure ourselves to do stuff we don't want to do. That works out so well, cause i can still beat to my own drum while having my boyfriend and vice versa. He called me this afternoon to tell me not to make plans tonight cause he had a surprise for me. How cute is that! Ok......enough with the lovy dovy.
Thanks to the beautiful weather we had this weekend, it motivated me to go out and get my hair done again. I dyed my hair blonde again, it's really crazy and super blonde. I am really happy with it. It's been awhile since i've been a blonde.....let's see if i could have more fun now!
S.
Apr. 4th, 2006
10:34 am
I hate being sick! Had to stay home yesterday due to a sick day. It was odd taking a sick day and actually being so sick I could not go in to work. I am always sick when i call in sick, but sometimes I make it to be worse to justify staying home. But yesterday, the couch was my best friend, house to myself, in my pj's watching way too much Smallville!
Weekend was pretty mellow, had the familly in town, watched many movies and just hung out. They brought us so much food that i don't even have room in my cubbords for it! It's always nice when you get free food! It won't go to waste that is for sure!
I have nothing to say right now......
that's sad :(
S.
Mar. 30th, 2006
12:19 pm
I got the day off tomorow. That makes me so very happy! I've been itching to have the day off for awhile now, so before i call in sick and spend a day dwelling in my own guilt for calling in sick. Took the day off and will actually be able to enjoy my time off. Life this week has been somewhat ok....nothing exciting....nothing boring.....just in the middle. Things with Jonathan are just going better and better, for awhile now I was questionning things and stuff but now...it just seems right. He is working again, that takes a lot of stress of the relationship so I am super happy for him. But now I have all this new found free time on my hands. Going to have to pick up a hoppy or activity soon. So I don't waste too much time couch surfing at home.
Still not decided on what my future should be after Bell. Me and my boss had some discussions today and looks like I will actually be getting laid off on May 30th as opposed to June 30th. This was my decsion, I just want to have the entire summer off not just two months. That made me happy, that leaves me with 2 months of this and then FREEDOM 26!
Last weekend was the weekend of ex's, spent Friday with James and Spent Sunday with Kori. I am so happy that I can now do that and not be an emotional wreck after. I am glad I've comfronted my monsters now, so much easier, so much less stress! Also my friend Chris is back in town from working on his cruise ships. It was nice to see him again, spoke to me about jobs on the boat and stuff and all I can say is that I am definetly interested on this oppurtunity. I know I can get the job, it's just a matter of making a decision that will not only affect me but the people around me. I will sit and ponder before making any big move. Well it's all I have to say....the weekend is nearly upon us....that makes me smile.....got my sister, niece and aunt all staying at my place for the weekend. Should be fun...going to take my niece to the Nature Museum.
S.
Mar. 24th, 2006
12:28 pm
Just scored a computer for home........I am so excited right now! Got a sweet deal......new computer for 220$! Can't really bit that, my house is coming together so nicely right now. Actually still have a shit load of other things to buy before It's finished. But seeing i work so hard here at Bell, spent the day yesterday calculating the prices of everything I need for the house and it's not that bad. I am going to buy one thing per pay cheques and hopefully have everything purchased by the time I get laid off. Then two whole months off to spend in my finished home! I am about 2000$ away from having everything I need for the place!
So the weekend is just around the corner, another 6 hours till freedom. Not exactly sure what the weekend will entail. Not much now that i got this computer, but I know that Jean-Guy is coming to town tonight....should be fun! Saturday it's my cousin Michelle's birthday, so she is having a a little party at the house. Should be fun cause it's our first party at the new place! Then after that we are going to be heading out MTL for the evening. My cousin Terry is spinning, he plays some good house music so for sure it will be a good dancing night! Sunday I plan on doing nothing except play with my new computer and start downloading like crazy! I just need a router to connect my X-Box to my computer so I may watch my downloads on my tv. Probly only get that the next payday....also need a monitor.....i might have a good deal on one....but i am broke so i hope it's still available in 2 weeks. Anyways...must actually do some work now....seeing it's friday......
S.
Mar. 23rd, 2006
12:28 pm
Afternoon shifts are really getting to me these days.....knowing i only have a few months left working here really put a hole in my motivation! I actually got my termination letter yesterday. I feel to frame it and put it on my desk for a source of motivation. I am almost done!
S.
Mar. 21st, 2006
03:43 pm
Just a test to see if I can post pics...i hope this works!!http://pic18.picturetrail.com/VOL938/38
S.
12:32 pm
Project Runway is getting soo good....I can't wait for the final episode! I am so happy I got cable back....life is just better with cable....and even better with PVR!
Last night was pretty chill, just hung out with Jonathan and Brad, smoked some green, watched some tele and talked and stuff. Nothing overly exciting....everyone i know seems to be cracked out from the weekend. Everyone I know went wild this weekend! Must of been somthing in the air! Whatever it was I did not breathe it in. I don't know why I don't like going out drinking anymore, I just find it such a waste of time and energy, something I am always struggling to get more of. I used to think I avoided the bars for my own personel reasons and now that I have confronted and dealt with those issues. The desire is still not there to go out! Oh well.....I will blame age for now....or my small town roots.......or anything else i can think of! All I know......is I rather hang out at home then go out to the club on a Saturday night. I am happy I have a boyfriend who is cool with that, cause in the homo world....that is hard to find....it's like the bar is part of our DNA or something!
Actually saw a drag show for the first time in a long time last friday......and yeah...don't miss those either!
S.
Mar. 20th, 2006
04:04 pm
Trying to list all the concert's I've attended cause they are starting to get blurry in my mind......
C+C Music Factory
Jann Arden twice
John Mayer
Madonna
Coldplay
Richard Ashcroft
Avril Lavigne
Canned Ham
Depeche Mode
Lauryn Hill
Sarah Harmer
What concert's have you seen?
S.
03:31 pm
Coldplay this weekend was really amazing! I did not expect the concert to be so good. He is an amazing entertainer on stage, very active and plays many instruments. My favorite part of the concert was when he did a tribute to Johnny Cash and sang two of his songs. I am still getting goose bumps thinking about it! After the concert I felt to continue the party and made my way to The Edge....what a mistake that was, why is that place busy...I just don't get it....the space is bad, the people are tacky the music is even worse! Anyways...finished my beer there and took off to go to Club Soda. Got there and luckily I knew the door person and did not have to pay cover twice in 30 minutes. Got there, although the music was better, the atmosphere kind of sucked! The bar was really empty actually, so split a beer with Jonathan and decided to call it quits and just go home. I don't feel so bad for refusing to go out to the clubs so many times! Icon was a much better gay club....Ottawa is seriously lacking!
After that headed over to my house to hang out with my sister who came down for the weekend. It was fun, did not really do much other then talk about stuff. She did do a grocery for me...that's always cool....free food...THANK YOU! I am super upset with myself now, a day later when it's too late. I should of gone to Kori's concert to be there for his first show. I could not get my sister to go cause she had plans and forced me to miss the show. I am sure the show was amazing, I just wish i could of seen it with my own eyes. But I am pretty confident I will get another chance to see him live again.
I am confused about stuff with my boyfriend as of lates, I am having problems with this party thing. That's all I will say about that for now......
S.
Mar. 17th, 2006
10:13 am
The weekend is finally upon us. Eventhough I only worked 4 days this week, it just seemed to drag on and on and on. So happy it's done and over with, and it's pay day today...can't ask for more! Tonight is the Coldplay concert, super hyped cause I just got news that i was going this week! And it's free! Should be a good show, was upset I missed them last time they were in town....now I get to see sexy Chris live and singing! He is just soo very hot, I would be even more excited in Gwenyth Paltrow was there too....I doubt it....but a homo can dream! After that me and Ben are heading off to the pubs on Elgin st. Should be a fun filled hetero night! I am just happy it's all around my house so I can stumble home when I've had enough of it. My sister is also in town this weekend. She is super excited to get a break from her kids this weekend. It's cool I guess, It's just my second weekend in a row that I have house guest. I have yet to really spend good quality time alone at home yet. Soon it will happen I suppose!
S.
Mar. 15th, 2006
11:20 am
Took a sick day yesterday....it was nice to have a day off where I did not have to do anything around the house. Had a very very lazy day! Woke up early and watched a movie, then played some vidoegames and basically sat on the couch with Jonathan all day. It was really nice!
Celebrated Tina's Birthday yesterday at Pancho Villa. It was fun, got to see some old friends and catch up on life and stuff. After that I hung out with James and Jonathan and watched a movie. It was a little strange to be sitting on the couch between both of them. It was like past, present and futur all sitting on the same couch. But overall it went really well and it was not really that akward. It's strange getting to re-know someone you already know. I kept getting old flashbacks of things when James was talkign or just how his manurisms were...all so familiar yet so distant. We are supposed to hang out this weekend again so it's cool to have a new friend I guess.
I have nothing to say really.....life is.....good......other then money issues...but that is nothing new!
S.
Mar. 13th, 2006
02:22 pm
So very tired of moving things. I am hoping this last weekend is the last time I need to move a couch or anything up a million flights of stairs! After too many early mornings and too many long nights of doing stuff I am glad to say I am about 95% finished all that needs to be done. Other then a few shelves to hang here and there and a few things to buy and a few things to organize. I am pretty much all setup. Finally got my couch back this weekend and I am so very happy to have a place to sit other then my bed! As much as I love lounging in bed it was getting to be a little much.
So seems me and James will be friends after all these years of no contact with one another. I am actually feeling really good about it. We are both in different places since we last spoke and I think that helps us be normal with each other and not dwell on things gone buy. We both kind of need friends right now, someone we can talk too. I am so lucky to have a boyfriend who understands what I am doing here with my Ex and allows me to do it without guilt or worry.
Jonathan is finally all moved into his new apartement. It's really cool that he now lives around the block from me. Very conveniant, it's like we are living together, but we are not....so that's good in my head. With all the pressure I initially got from him to actually move in with him, I feel like I could breath again. It was too much pressure too fast in a new relationship and after many nights of arguments and discussion we are both no the same page and both understand where we are coming from. I don't think his living situation with Julian will prove to be as bad as I initially thought it would be. I think it's a good arrangement for both of them.
Still anxiously awaiting being off for the summer. Who would of thought being laid off would be such an exciting thing! All I think about is waking up any time i want, going to Meech lake any time I want. And just having 100% control of my own time! Only 3 months to go and it's freedom 26! Might be my last time till retirement!
S.
Mar. 9th, 2006
11:27 am
What a stressful night last night. It's so hard to be a good boyfriend sometimes! I just feel so removed from myself sometimes when I am in a relationship. Guilt suddendly over takes the things I enjoy doing on my own. As if I am letting someone down as soon as I do something that I only like. Thanks to conversations and realizations things are ok again, but man I hate that shit!
S.
Mar. 8th, 2006
01:41 pm
The big move is now completed. Only missing my sofa and I am set to go! I am so very happy on how things have turned out.......my room is so very big....my closet is huge! Coming from my small little room on Albert st...I really appreciate the extra space! Living with Michelle is turning out to be really good! She is crazy in all the right ways. It's like we communicate without really talking to each other. A weird sister brother type bond we have! We are going to be great roomies for sure! So very happy Jonathan really likes my place too....means I will have to spend less time at his place and more at mine! I like the sound of that arangement much more then me going there. His new apartement will only be a few blocks away too. So that worked out really well for both of us. Don't know what to say anymore...oh yeah.......I can't wait to be laid off!
S.
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